She felt like it was recess again. Like she had to fit in or be bullied around. But these were grown adults now. And as funny as it sounds she did not see some of them as adults but rather overgrown children. She knew deep down she was different from them. A background rich in culture, imagination, education, technology, art, travel, gaming, writing….She could go on but there is no point. They didn’t care to know any of this. She was fighting a current beneath her feet, caused by the opening of a dam which inevitably had to happen because she would never conform to their idea of an ideal person. And she knew the dam was opened by someone who was close minded and wanted to flood her brain with a false sense of not being good enough.

But she fell for it…

She fell for the most childish game on the planet. The one in recess where another kid walks up and tells the other what he/she is lacking all the time. And usually the truth is the kid with the mouth always moving has nothing nice to say, and nothing of value to share or teach. The bully usually just hides between their fabricated self worth, judging others closely, and rarely looking at themselves. But she knew the bullys time would come. And it would be a hard fall due to such efforts put towards avoidance. You see, the longer you blame others, the longer the consequence you will have.

And she won’t fall for the confidence game anytime soon…

It is now too familiar. The stern look towards her. The over analyzing of her mannerisms. The focus on all negative attributes with no encouragement given. The feeling she is not on a team, but rather on a team which competes with one another, always trying to throw someone else under the bus. Always trying to get into someone else’s business, not because they care, but rather because they just want to hold it against the person later. It’s sad.

And she won’t conform to it…

Even if it makes her less likely to get along with others. Because people who live in the dark, and act like the light, are worse than those who embrace the dark. They are bullys, waiting for their next target, rather than helping others.

I just want to sBullying does not just happen in childhood, it happens in adulthood as well and our children do not just pick up these habits from other children. They pick habits up from adults and carry these attitudes on for most of their lives, before realizing how many people they have misjudged. We must stop the problem when it begins, which may require some self reflection.