He Holds

He holds a heart

all mangled up

like ground beef

but serves it like filet mignon

hopes you’re so tired you play along

hoping you’ll just sing the same song

create a different dance…

but you tend to glance

over at the people having more fun…

At first

you do

you take it all in

and through you

then repeat, repeat, repeat…

until your heart is like his

all beat…

mangled…

unable to complete..

a thought without it angled

in perfect tune

with his erratic brain waves

 

And he holds his hand

as if its not his own

He holds his head

as if his neck has one bone…

He holds up the sky

as if he created it…

then sails the sea

as if he put the water in it…

but he will learn

we are all creatures of a storm

trickling to our hearts

there can be an over pour

of crimson proportions

and we all must face our demons

to endure a kiss

that’s worthy of love

pure bliss…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You’re Down Mofo

You’re down mofo

like a yo yo

ready to be brought up again

by someone else’s downfall

you create illusions in minds

then when its time

to fess up

it’s all them

not you

It’s sad you wear armor

but battle your own mind

and in return it create a bind

to no one

You wasted months

but I’d rather not have it be years

of judgment upon my ways

that were engaged by the cold world

left me outside with sleeves too short

outgrown my jacket like I did you

and you may have had the first laugh

but mine will be the last.

Beliefs

He comes in dreams. I think he is an entity of some sort. He holds my head up when I wake up. He kneels beside me as if I am a child and places my arms across each other and upon my shoulders. He tells me hold onto myself tightly and he will in return watch over me. He could be pure evil or pure good for all i know. I trusted him with my life for some time and hope for his own sake when he passes into the afterlife he meant all good deeds towards me. I believe in my mind whether it is true for belief is more powerful than disbelief. Although, disbelief can lead to new understandings depending on circumstances. I believe it is ultimately one’s goal to make a system on beliefs in their own mind to perhaps make sense out of life and death. We all have unusual situations that infiltrate our minds with memories we cannot comprehend in the moment.Their significance is perhaps not understood under later parts in life when forces align to create a sort of epiphany. I believe the person has a spirit like the Egpytians…but it has many parts. One is born with a sort of identity based upon physical and mental elements no person is one of the same. It is unique with boundaries and capabilities of its own it has to embrace in order to achieve a sort of enlightening. My spirit has come to terms with its born spirit enough to realize one depends upon the other. The Ba in Egyptian culture represents the spirit in the afterlife which must return to the Ka in order to sustain immortality. I believe this is symbolic. It is almost as if life is about reconciling with the inner childlike spirit we all possess and realizing the two are important in all aspects of life. They are the path to true righteousness, bravery, respect, admiration, truth, and immortality. Realizing one must maintain a balance between the two and fight against wrongdoing is a huge step in accepting death as part of life. It is easier to accept death if a person understands the many elements which make up their physical and mental state. No person has one identity. No person can be defined by a single word. The spirit is like a rainbow and a person’s duty is to be the brightest colors when the end approaches. Accept good and bad but remain in touch with all the layers of their spirit. And if it takes a belief which cannot be proven with science then so be it…it can be proven with culture.Thank you.

Kiss the Fangs

I feel like a child lost in the world with a ton of beasts, fangs ready to suck the imagination out of me. So much money, time, patience wasted upon the wrong people. There are no boundaries for them. They will say and do whatever you please but when you think about it the motive is unclear? Such a world of leeches. They take a beautiful lake and turn it into a swamp. It must be sad in theirs minds. I must admit I love little and hate more. But is that normal in American society? I feel a decline has began on a personal level as well as political level. People will now lie, cheat, and steal in order to achieve the american dream.. I lie awake at night with thoughts of a world in chaos. All around me is fire, my precious land I worked so hard to sustain now cinders beneath me. Do you see it coming? A change needs to be made. A rise of those tired working hands and praise for those who give their lives to this country; the working class. No praise for those gluttonous creatures who prey upon inequality as a means of financial gain. Thank you.

No Blame Game

I will always love you

like Whitney Houston said

before she died

and lived life instead…

I will always love you until the sky becomes pale

like your face…

And I wish I could have held you…

but I just remember I did…

and it only worked for so long..

so I blame no one…

you nor I

I blame my tears on a past full of goodbyes

I wish you could have felt my insides…

could have swallowed up your own lack of pride

Could see the same suffering in infinite…

with each breath…

and I would take my last one with you

but your eyes grew cold

and no one could save you

for you gave up on love…

went to despair…

but I wish you were my love waiting on the end of pier

as if my reward for suffering stood over the purity of water

A king with no shiny armor…

for his heart has it own.

 

I Honestly Hate You (I Honestly Love You Cover)

I hate you

I honestly blame you

You don’t have an answer

I can’t see it anymore in your eyes

Maybe it was better off left for dead

this is plain and simple

And you shouldn’t rationalize

it’s coming from head and not my heart….

I hate you…

I honestly blame you…

I am attempting to make you feel uncomfortable

I am trying to make you see what you’ve become

but this feeling comes along everyday

you bombed the getaway car and can’t run

I hate you…

I honestly blame you…

If we were both on an island

in another time and a cage

this moment might end in a fist

and there you’d be with your knife

And here I am with a gun

So I guess we’ll assume who won…

I hate you

I honestly hate you

I honestly hate you..

Mending Our Generation

Living in a dream

It seems…

I did everything they wanted

And I still do not know

Who it was for…

Are they beneath the ground?

Or above the clouds?

Are they hidden?

Or trying not to be found?

I think they dug a hole

Like animals…

Reproduced within all their comforts…

And left the fallen to work above their lairs…

I just want an answer

Even if it doesn’t make me free

I just want an answer

Someone to see

The pain greed creates

The flight then fall

I anticipate

Every time I wake….

Living a scheme

It seems…

I have fallen

With the lost and forgotten

Trying to find the nail for my own coffin

They had the money to buy

And the money to break me into…

I just want an answer…

Even if it doesn’t offer peace

I just want to stare into the face

Of those responsible for the mistakes

Our generation has to mend…

The Pebble Roll

There is nothing surprising me anymore

I feel like I am glued to my headboard

Dreams of far away places

I will never see

Cascading down the slope I created in my life

Like a pebble down a hill

I feel as if the force of life

Has granted me some time off

Solitude

Adventure

Then solitude

Adventure

In search of something I lost a long time ago…

Perhaps My ability to imagine anything

To dream of pirate ships

Of castles bombarded by trees pressing upon their gates

Of a garden the size of a country all to myself

Of a world much different than this…

And I am torn between my imagination

And the state we call reality…

And When I wake up

There is nothing in this world

I cannot see

Cannot dream

I see faces in trees

Clouds smiling upon me

River and streams

Flowing into a fantasy world

All within the depths of my mind…

So Maybe I am suppose to roll

Like a pebble down a hill

Shifting between solitude

adventure

Solitude then

adventure

In search of the mind I once had as a child.

The Runaway

Everyone becomes one of the same…

and we all sit around and complain as if no one is listening

but the ruckus has already been heard for way too long

The voice no longer complements but ruins the song

The words become judgments and nothing is learned…

Trapping the listener on a page that cannot be turned..

While we all know…

It could have been turned into any glorified story

if the mind wandered far enough..

but not too far from daily activities

as if it decided to walk into the woods

then return for dinner casually…

I sit and wonder why we all try so hard

to find something we have all along

to prove something that exists already

to taste the sour kiss of the familiar again

unable to comprehend it’s all the same my friend…

 

I just want to swim away

make my own bed to lay

find the mind that wont let me stray

live and breathe every last day…

 

Everyone becomes one of the same…

a memory and I don’t want to complain

make it seem like everything is lame

when the next interstate I cross could bring own a whole new destination….

but I have this dedication

to those whose words are left unspoken

to those who hurt and cannot mend what has been broken

never give up on the life you have chosen

for your tears will become frozen

the hourglass will empty its sand

and time will become nothing but the hand

of a clock…

 

I just want to find a random road to take…

fill my tank and call this a chance to make….

my ambitions come alive

embrace reality and try not hide..

who I am

Forgotten or Remembered?

Hold me for awhile

I feel like a battered animal

Found on the side of the road

Left to the forces of nature

Left to be forgotten

Left perhaps for the one person out of hundreds

Who will stop to check my breath

It either one or the other in this world

The worst or the best from a bad situation

I know this too well

This familiar feeling creeping its way in on me

The familiar light spinning all around me

Creating a kind of depth I cannot make sense of

But enjoy trying to

But would enjoy trying to with someone

Who could matter

Who could save me from the road

Could save me from my own nature

Could bind me to them from my feet to my face

Could show me the world is still the same

Show me I just grew tired of the same ol stuff

Sitting in the same ol place

So I pushed everything into different spots

creating the illusion I now cannot ignore

but he will make me see it is all the same…

and find comfort in knowing no matter how much

The mind sees things as rearranged

The negative of the image still exists…